Cuidado con los consejos en Internet
Este artículo es necesario, porque desgraciadamente me encuentro a menudo ante situaciones que se han vuelto inmanejables, debido a decisiones dictadas por haber escuchado a personas de dudosa utilidad. Los consejos de la web pueden ser muy útiles si se tienen las herramientas adecuadas para descifrarlos, pero se convierten en un problema si estas herramientas no existen.
Hace tiempo, cuando teníamos un problema sentimental, lo hablábamos con nuestro amigo, muchas veces no nos daban ninguna solución útil, pero al menos nos conocían bien, y muchas veces conocían realmente nuestra situación, por lo que decían cosas útiles para nuestro bien.
Hoy en día se recurre principalmente a la web, incluso en este blog, la gente suele pedir consejos y sugerencias, pero siempre intentamos dar un punto de vista subjetivo, no verdades absolutas.
Por el contrario, otras personas tratan de desestabilizar aún más a las personas que ya pueden estar emocionalmente probadas.
Evidentemente, no todas las situaciones son insidiosas, así que trataré de esbozar lo que creo que son las circunstancias en las que es bueno prestar atención y evaluar los consejos que llegan.
Gurús de la seducción
En mi experiencia en la red, los grupos sobre el tema del amor, la dependencia emocional, la lucha contra los narcisistas, etc. etc., son con diferencia la peor guarida de gente con cero empatía.
Y sí, así es, donde uno espera encontrarlo no lo hay, además esta gente suele dar consejos totalmente equivocados, porque como que disfrutan arruinando las historias de los demás.
Una de las cosas que siempre notas en estos grupos, es la facilidad con la que siempre te aconsejan cerrar, huir, no hacer contacto, ignorar, etc. Si bien es cierto que en algunos casos puede ser el consejo más sensato, en otros no sólo no es sensato, sino que es realmente erróneo.
Nadie tiene que decirte si debes o no bloquear a una persona, lo mismo si debes ignorarla, son cosas que tienes que madurar. Es bonito pedir opiniones, también es muy útil desahogarse, contar y escribir, pero la elección final debe ser sólo tuya. Nunca hagas algo porque alguien te lo diga en la web.
Esta gente es en mi opinión la peor, tienen un público muy adelantado y hacen todo lo posible para que estas personas se sientan aún más solas. He visto uno que no voy a nombrar, donde este señor aconseja a las mujeres que descarten a todos los hombres con ciertas características.
Hasta aquí todo bien, excepto que enumeró características que se encuentran en el 99% de la población mundial.
En definitiva, este hombre zorro, quiere mantenerlas solteras todo lo posible para que le sigan, y se cuelguen de cada una de sus palabras, no hace falta decir que los que te ponen límites demasiado inalcanzables no quieren tu bien, quieren que te quedes exactamente donde estás, sin evolucionar ni avanzar nunca.
Vendedores de cursos
Estos son quizás los que menos consejos dan, y son básicamente los más honestos.
Sólo pretenden venderte su curso, su método, y rara vez dan consejos sobre las relaciones, aparte de «eh pero con mi método te habría ido mejor». Aunque no me gusta especialmente el género, no creo que sean los peores, de hecho quizás sean los mejores de todos.
Siempre hay que agradecer a los que te dicen sin medias tintas lo que quieren de ti, y sólo quieren venderte cursos. Si crees que gracias a ellos tendrás todas las mujeres u hombres que quieras, pues…
¡Me encanta Youtube! Lo veo mucho, me parece que hay muchas cosas interesantes y entretenidas en él. Pero, además, hay muchos profesionales serios que dan consejos reales y hablan de temas serios.
El problema surge, cuando en lugar de escuchar a los profesionales, se escucha a personas que hablan de cosas serias como algunos trastornos de la personalidad sin experiencia, sólo porque dicen haberlos tratado.
En fin, como si yo hablara de la varicela, ya que tuve varicela, explicando cómo se cura, se previene, etc, obviamente nadie me creería (con razón), pero en estos temas, se cree al primero que pasa.
Ciertas cosas deben ser tratadas sólo por profesionales cualificados, y sólo ellos pueden decirte lo que buscas, y nunca lo harían a través de un vídeo.
En definitiva, la web es una herramienta perfecta, hay tanto alimento para el pensamiento, consejos, blogs, vídeos, todo lo que queramos. La web puede ayudarnos a mejorar, a estudiar, a hacer cosas que no sabemos hacer, pero hay que saber usarla.
Si alguien en la web recomienda cosas como si fueran verdades absolutas, no digo que esté equivocado, pero al menos hazte dos preguntas.
For years, the number of users of dating sites has been developing positively, as relevant statistics show. And this is no coincidence, because the business model also puts good money into the coffers of the operators – in 2017, singles exchanges in Germany alone will generate just under 211 million euros, and internationally, sales will be in the trillions.
This makes it all the more difficult to understand that a singles exchange should function free of charge. The big dating portals are better known and more heavily frequented, and in addition to a limited free offer, they primarily offer premium accounts. But there are also completely free singles’ exchanges that allow you to make contact and offer a variety of functions such as chats and emoticons as well as access to forums and groups without any fees.
These dating platforms are also regularly checked against the usual evaluation criteria – only the points price level and payment options are naturally omitted. Essential factors for the comparison of the free single stock exchanges are thus primarily reliable data to the
to the number of users
to the number of active users
- to customer service
In the free single stock exchange test you can quickly get an overview – further information and important details can be found below.
We Provide The Best Dating Services For 10 Years
One more point should be mentioned: Free online chat rooms are dependent on advertising revenue – you will find banners on the individual pages that are meant to encourage you to click on them. However, these offers are usually clearly separated from the buttons you can use to perform the different functions. An impairment is not to be expected by the advertising – and somehow these flirt sites have to be financed.
What a free single dating should offer
The established dating portals such as eDarling, PARSHIP or LoveScout24 and ElitePartner advertise with the free registration option and some functions that are available free of charge. However, if you want to contact another single for free or write a direct message, this is not possible – you will first be presented the conditions for the Premium Accounts. If you are looking for free single chat dating that not only allow you to view profiles, but also to send messages or chat with other singles for free, you will certainly find what you are looking for. First of all: When it comes to user-friendliness, you will have to make some concessions.
And the differences between the online platforms on which you can meet singles for free are great. As a positive surprise, the flirt site Jappy, which comes along with some social media functions, presented itself as a positive surprise during the free singles exchange test: You can use forums, join groups and post status ads via emotions. However, if you want to send gifts or play one of the games, you need points. These cannot be purchased, but are awarded for your activity on the dating portal and in the various groups. Thus Jappy creates one thing above all: The users are extremely active, which breathes an attractive liveliness into the whole portal.
In addition, the other free online chats can quite keep up with the functions: News, chats, rating of pictures and the likening and marking of profiles – all these possibilities are open to you. Exciting are the matching games at Finya, which are reminiscent of the dating roulette of large providers. It is easy to understand that the free singles exchanges cannot master such cost-intensive features as an app. The flirt pages themselves are programmed in a responsive design, so they are also well displayed on mobile devices. In view of the different requirements, however, it is important to differentiate the really free dating sites from those that only make certain functions accessible free of charge: The revenues from the premium accounts give them a completely different scope of action, which is reflected in the service offer, but above all in the additional features. It is therefore also a question of attitude and demands, which of the providers as the best free singles exchange or the suitable dating portal is suitable for you.
What distinguishes free chat rooms
Compared with the liable to pay the costs offerers a free chats must make compromises, that is in view of the missing contribution incomes clearly obvious. Primarily the differences are thus within the service range: If you want to become acquainted with another single free of charge, then somewhat more expenditure lies before you – partner suggestions can expect you just as little as a personality test. However, if you browse through the large number of profiles, there are sometimes only limited filters available, which does not detract from the pleasant atmosphere, on the contrary. Experience has shown that young and communicative people who are primarily looking for a quick flirt, but who also have nothing against a deepening relationship, cavort on these pages.
Can free chat rooms be reputable?
This question can be answered clearly: Yes! However, you should consider that free chat sites are regularly used for trying out, i.e. for getting started. They find therefore many inexperienced members, who want to test this possibility of the establishment of contact for itself. This is actually no problem, because the handling of the dating portals is extremely simple. And yet you should be aware that a new contact may be a little hesitant to open up or even show skepticism – so be patient, which is appropriate for online dating anyway.
Can respectable dating sites be free of charge For the ladies it might be very pleasant that the gentlemen on these portals are in the majority – contrary to the liable to pay the costs offerers. The chance to be written to fast and by many other Usern is therefore very large. The average age of the users is regularly between 25 and 34 years. If this is too young for you, it is best to choose a free dating site for over 35-year-olds or seniors – they too can be found on the World Wide Web. Also with regard to the number of members, the free providers differ from the fee-based alternatives: The communities are significantly smaller, but still respectable. After all, it always depends on the one or the other.
So it’s up to you, the user, to be successful on free dating sites: On the one hand, you should not select the radius for your search too narrowly in order to increase your chances of a hit. You are sure to encounter nice and open-minded people – even with the pre-programmed addresses. Of course, more promising is an individual and personally formulated inquiry that explicitly addresses the respective profile and, above all, is of a high standard. Under no circumstances should you aim below the belt – you certainly don’t like that yourself any more than the other users. Present yourself authentically and make yourself interesting.
Making your own profile interesting
To visit a chat free of charge without registration and to hope for great success might not be very promising – at least if you are interested in serious contacts. The linchpin is a concise profile. Please pay attention to an attractive portrait photo, a creative motto that brings your personality to the point, correct and complete information.
Check yourself: If you are looking for a single, what are you looking for in the first place? The profile, of course – all the more important it is to take some time for it. After all, you determine nothing less than the first impression that other users can make of you. The photo alone decides whether your profile will be clicked on or not – so choose your photo carefully. You should present yourself in a humorous and relaxed way to directly arouse the interest of other members. Sometimes a selfie will also fit if it presents an important side of you. Using a free chat without a photo is not recommended if you are seriously looking for one.
Then there is the text field, which you can fill out freely: Apart from the fact that you should definitely stick to the truth, you should come up with an original description of yourself. Not too much, not too little – you can be quite mysterious. On the other hand, openness is recommended: communicate clearly who or what you are looking for. The ideas of the users go here far apart: If some are looking for a quick and noncommittal flirt, others for acquaintances for common leisure activities, there are also users who are looking for the great love. So spare yourself disappointments or annoying discussions by playing with open cards from the outset – you certainly expect the same from the other users of the free chat.
Contact possibilities at free chats
Even if the free providers have to keep their service slim, a nice selection of contact options is still open to you: Beyond the internal news system you can chat at many free chats and of course send gifts or emoticons. Furthermore, you are free to rate certain photos, postings or statements, for example with a Like. Show your sympathies and attract the attention of your dream partner, the prelude to an exciting flirt can be that easy.
You won’t even notice that there are neither standard greetings nor so-called icebreaker questions – anyway, the individual messages are much more meaningful and promising. So there are some differences to the payment pages, but they are hardly relevant in this point. A nice change is offered by the games, which make it easier to get to know each other at some free chats. Even if there are no apps and mobile flirting is not easy even with a responsive design, chats can act serious and appealing for free – you will find that out very quickly by yourself.
You will get in contact with other users quite quickly with your messages. With your own chat requests you can exchange information and details intensively, but patience is recommended here as well, so as not to frighten your counterpart. And yet the opportunity to make new friends in a very uncomplicated way, to deepen these friendships step by step and to get to know each other better – a nice alternative for shy and somewhat less determined people.
Use search filters skillfully and find dream partners
The established chats advertise with scientifically based methods of partner search. With the help of a personality test the suitable profiles are selected and presented in the Matching procedure – you cannot count on that with free chats. Here you have to become active yourself, partner suggestions are not submitted to you. The bottom line is that you will have to spend a little more time to select the candidates that come into question – but this also has its appeal: you can start your search with an open mind, regardless of any algorithms. However, it is important that you first think about what exactly you expect and are looking for.
As soon as you are clear about this, you can start: In the first step, take a look at the available search filters, with which you can already make initial selections. Use them as well as possible to limit the selection to a practicable level. In most cases, filters are provided that relate to appearance, height, figure or even hair color. Further criteria can be the concrete intentions, i.e. whether a user is only looking for a flirt or a serious relationship, but also certain habits such as alcohol or nicotine consumption. Even the age and region can be narrowed down to make the search successful. If a particular combination does not fit a profile, then change small nuances according to your preferences – you will quickly find out how to use the search filters optimally.
Free chats and the topic of security
There are always reports of rip-offs or fraud on online portals – and this also applies to online dating. Particularly annoying are the fake accounts that the providers have to defend themselves against: They try to encourage users to access paid services. A further phenomenon are the Romance Scammers. These are scammers that bring users into an emotional dependency, fake financial distress for them in order to get money. It is always amazing what ideas criminals come up with and how successful they are with them.
However, these approaches are now well known, so that chats can take targeted countermeasures. On the one hand, you will also find a button on the free providers that you can use to block users and report accounts that appear suspicious. Spam filters also ensure that certain messages, for example with advertisements for other chats, are sorted out. Of course, there are still gaps, even the payment pages can’t be sure to catch all fake accounts by checking their personal data. With the free chats, only limited effort can be made here, but none of the dating portals can guarantee a complete ID check. Remain therefore attentive, then nothing can happen.
Mobile flirting and dating apps – what’s behind them?
Mobile flirting with a dating appThe proportion of mobile users of dating platforms in Germany is still clear, but this trend will increase. It might be only a question of time, Europe-wide the relevant single Apps can already enjoy a large demand, as the user numbers of Tinder or LOVOO show. On its own App you will have to do without with the free chats however, but not on the possibility of accessing the side also on the way completely mobilely: Most Datingportals are programmed in such a way that they adapt themselves automatically to the respective equipment.
In contrast to the app, you therefore remain independent of the operating system, all important elements are thus reliably displayed – just like in the respective desktop version. However, please keep in mind that this consumes data volume and usually only a slimmed-down page is available. But if you want to stay in touch, react quickly to messages or start a chat, then you can look forward to the free chats.
Customer service and user-friendliness at free chats
One thing right from the start: The free chats are also easy to use and navigate, even if the layout is perhaps a little more economical or does not look quite modern. But that is certainly not what matters to you. Do not be bothered by the advertising, which is essential for the operators, all functions are intuitive and geared to the respective target group.
And yet, there are still some cutbacks to be made: Technical support or a hotline that promises help with flirting cannot guarantee a free dating site, nor can special events or seminars. These are rather offered by the big dating portals to increase your chances of a successful flirt. So it is up to you to arrange a very real meeting – in the various groups, forums or directly with another user. If the flirt sites are linked to the social media, however, the community organizes its own events – and that can be very exciting.
If there are any technical problems with the site, it’s best to send an email directly to the support – you won’t be successful over the phone. Even if it takes a while to process your request, it will usually be handled in a competent and friendly manner – the bottom line is that the service is also very good at the free chats.
Our conclusion: free chats that suit you
If you want to take your first steps towards online dating, then you can safely access free chats: you are sure to make new friends and meet nice people who you would not have met otherwise. However, it is doubtful whether the soul mates will work, this is where the platforms reach their limits. So just try out the dating platforms, but lower your expectations a little bit.
The numerous functions and, of course, the possibilities to exchange information directly or in groups are pleasant. The free chats do not have to hide in comparison to the cost-intensive alternatives, as they offer access to other singles, but also to exciting games that make flirting even more entertaining. The fact is, however, that the number of fake accounts is naturally higher here because the enormous amount of control required cannot be managed. So there is always a little caution, then you should master this hurdle. So if you get involved, you will definitely encounter a strong sense of community in the groups and interesting profiles – what you make of it is of course entirely up to you.